Sovereign Love: A Valentine Reflection

 

Valentine’s Day is often reduced to romance, performance, or public display. For me, it represents something deeper: alignment, sovereignty, and sacred partnership rooted in God. I was 16years young when I first debated on Gods love & human love at school, & made my first valentines gift, handmade rock carving. I was coming of age, & I was not allowed to talk about boys, dating, sex or what my body was going through with my mother, as it was an insult to her & disrespect to be challenged, questioned & talked to like a friend. So I chose God, mothers in my school, friends circle, Oprah, nature, books & my own spirit's choice. My fathers on the other hand, negotiated, protected, guided, loved, nurtured, advised, met and would listen to my endless curiosity like best friends. So it was God, me, my father, and then men, in that order.

Love, in its highest form, is not dependency. It is an expansion. It does not complete a woman. It reveals the strength she has already built within.

From a young age, I understood that energy is sacred. Discipline, privacy, and spiritual grounding were not restrictions; they were protection. I learned early that intimacy should follow alignment, not impulse. Celibacy, at different seasons of my life, was not deprivation. It was clarity. It allowed me to hear my spirit without noise and to choose partnership consciously.

Every relationship I entered was intentional. I am a monogamist by nature, and I treated partnership as sacred training. Each chapter taught boundaries, patience, emotional integrity, and discernment. Love alone was never enough, nor was ambition without negotiation. Alignment, vision, and spiritual coherence mattered more.

I have experienced partnerships rooted in equality, respect, and intellectual and spiritual challenge. I have also experienced divergence when visions no longer matched. I learned that profound connection does not justify compromising authenticity. True love does not demand self-erasure, nor does it require performance.

Engagement, in its true sense, is not a milestone for social approval. It is a strategic agreement between two sovereign individuals who share direction, faith, and values. Commitment is sustained not by emotion alone but by discipline, accountability, and shared growth.

Marriage, at its highest expression, is covenant. Spiritual before legal. Sacred before cultural. It is the union of two whole beings choosing interdependence without losing identity. It amplifies essence rather than diminishing it. And breaking up is part of life, as I choose with discernment, thus I practice healthy breakups, where one is hurt more than the other, but done with light not in the darkness.

Each phase in my life, men have come that we are aligned with that season, I have been engaged, I have broken hearts and my heart has been broken. As feminine awareness rises globally, more women are reclaiming their voices. A utopian woman does not seek rescue. She builds herself first. She aligns to God first. She protects her energy. She waits for a partnership that expands her purpose rather than shrinking it. And she is open to learning from her mistakes, taking responsibility & choosing herself then regret, to heal & grow each time. LOVE is a profound feeling deep within, like a magnet to Gods divinity, powerful & soothing. So as Rumi says I was not seeking love, I was seeking to find all the barriers within myself that I had inherited, experienced, & been coded, to unchain my heart.

Today, I celebrate love in its sovereign form.

Love that is aligned.
Love that is disciplined.
Love that is God-centered.
Love that does not rush.
Love that honors individuality within union.

Deldeyoch stands for this higher architecture of relationship. Partnership  & Marriage as sacred expansion. Commitment as conscious choice. Marriage as covenant, not convenience.

On this Valentine’s Day, the message is simple:

Wholeness first.
God first.
Union as reflection, never reduction.

Love is not about being chosen.
It is about choosing in truth as an equally yoked Spiritual partner for life.

Happy Valentines 💜🌿